"One Man's Twisted Vision... Mankind is History."

"When the Fate of the World Can Lie
In a Drop of Water."

At last! It's here! With excited child-like glee I ripped open my Amazon parcel to reveal my brand-spanking new Daniel Bernhardt DVD - 'Global Effect'! Armed with my custom-made Daniel Bernhardt T-shirt (yes, that's right, I got one - who da man!?!) and a lukewarm can of Pepsi, I sat down in front of my DVD player rubbing my hands like an excited gibbon.

I proudly own every Bernhardt movie on DVD (and most on VHS too), and after forcing my less-than enthusiastic friends and fiancé to sit through 'Special Forces' (which was difficult even for me, a guy who's seen Future War at least 8 times), I was wondering just how good this could be. First it was filmed in yet another classic obscure location for Daniel (see Bloodsport 4, Nature Unleashed: Tornado, Special Forces), this time South Africa; secondly Daniel's face isn't even the focal point of the new front cover; and thirdly having followed the movie's mysterious history (no one had any news on if and when it'd be released) I was wondering whether this'd be a worthy addition to the Bernhardt legacy!

Well I have news for you my friends, this is one of Bernhardt's best movies to date, sitting comfortably alongside Perfect Target and True Vengeance (excluding The Matrix Reloaded since it's just a co-starring role). There's no dodgy dubbing, no rubber dinosaurs, no poverty-stricken eastern-European locations and no James Hong.

These are depressing times, I know.

"No James Hong?!?!" I hear you shout. So who's in this picture? Well, cast opposite Daniel as our villain is Joel West as Nile Spencer, giving his best Brad Pitt from Fight Club impression throughout. Daniel himself portrays a highly effective special forces soldier named Lieutenant Marcus Poynt. His character is fairly gritty, recalling his role in True Vengeance quite rigidly, with very few pearly-white smiles until the end.

As for Arnold Vosloo who is apparently our 'star' power here, he kind of just pops up as a government advisor from time to time - he probably has around 10 minutes screen time in total, serving solely to rob Daniel of that top spot on the credits. Our classic damsel in distress (who we just know that Daniel's gonna get to pop before the credits roll) is the hopeful scientist played by Madchen Amick - a former Twin Peaks star... who unfortunately I hadn't heard of until my girlfriend made me watch the series on DVD recently. However she plays her role well and is very easy on the eyes (translation: she's a babe!), so I certainly have no complaints.

Ok, so we have our cast... what are they doing - well, a deadly virus has broken out in South Africa, that causes people to cough a lot before they die and their eyes turn blue. Ok, as movie viruses go, it's a bit weak on the gross-out-front, but it's disturbingly fast-acting & fatal enough to make most viewers feel uneasy about the next time you have to reach for a Strepsil. Anyhoo in short - the virus breaks out but it's controlled with simple mathematics: village + napalm = no virus. Samples are then collected to find a cure to prevent further breakouts, but a crazy wacko (Spencer) catches wind of this and breaks in and cashes in his five-finger discount for the virus, its cure and our dear beloved doctor. His plan? To wipe out most of the world with the virus to cleanse humanity. The solution? Daniel Bernhardt!... oh, and some South African special forces (translation: generic cannon-fodder).

Anyway, Nile Spencer has made his equally wacko girlfriend go out and spread the disease whilst we learn that Daniel once had a chance to kill this guy before, but the US cronies told him not to shoot - so this time he's out for [true?] vengeance. That's our set-up... so how's the execution? Well the plot follows along its not too original story of a virus breaking out, the US hovering their hand over the trigger to nuke all of Africa (as you do!) and Daniel running against the clock to find his man, secure the virus (& its cure) and rescue the good doctor.

I will admit, the movie had a good sense of tension and never failed to pull on the heart-strings; numerous infected, dying children turn up throughout the picture - so bite that bottom lip and be strong... remember, it's just a movie! Daniel gets to whip-out his best one-liner since True Vengeance... (you'll have to watch and find out - you can't miss it) although he has only one scene in which he goes "YAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH"! to make me feel like a kick-ass action hero too as I bounce up and down on the sofa karate-chopping the air. Oh well, I can still watch Future War if I need my fix.

Incidentally, it was sorta weird to hear Daniel yelling a load of obscenities in this movie, since he's not famed for it in his films - I mean swearing's cool and stuff, but it just came off a little forced at times, Daniel doesn't need to be written to stoop to this level to be a bad-ass.

Aside from that and a very small editing error, the movie flows very nicely and builds well to its sadly somewhat predictable climax. The error? Well, in one scene Daniel and the good doctor look back out to sea in first-person perspective after having swum back to shore from a burning ship. If you look at the water in front of the boat as its shown ablaze you'll notice the two of them still in the water swimming towards the beach (obviously intended to be shown before they reached the beach, but moved during editing).

I could go deeper into the plot, the subplots, the characters and such - but then why would you bother seeing it? It's a good movie for its budget, with convincing-enough special effects, one that Daniel should be proud of and certainly better than a lot of crap I've seen in theaters recently. So all you Bernholics out there can rest easy and look forward to this latest movie of his.

Incidentally, 15 seconds from the credits, just as I'd lost hope that Daniel would win over the chick, he unleashes his lady-killing smile and with his classy tough-guy-with-a-soft-heart demeanor he requests a date from the good doctor... which she very obviously accepts - and what girl wouldn't?

A killer virus, a low-rent Brad Pitt, nuclear rockets, Daniel Bernhardt, slow-motion shoot-outs and in the end he gets the girl... isn't this what we all want in a movie? Well if you're me, then the answer to that is most certainly "Yes!". Anyway, by made-for-video standards, this is definitely an entertaining movie that achieves well in all it hopes to, even if it isn't exactly oozing with originality.